I don't often discipline my daughter, she's only two, but I do make her sit down sometimes (like a time out) when she won't stop throwing a tantrum. Unfortunately, my mother-in-law always, always butts in. Today, around 5 PM and before dinner, Emily was throwing a tantrum. I made her sit down until she stopped flailing her arms like a madman. Dr. Julia came in and handed my daughter a piece of candy. Emily stopped crying, of course, but for all the wrong reasons. Not to mention it was before dinner and I do not allow any candy or sweets before dinner.
Julia knows this. She cannot plead ignorant because this has happened a dozen times - heck, dozens of times! Yet she continues to do it. She just wants Emily to shut up and she satisfies my daughter's wants all the time when it is inappropriate. Emily cries, Emily gets candy. Emily screams, Emily gets chocolate milk. She is rewarding my daughter for fussing!
Interesting that Emily never behaves like this with my parents. They do not put up with her tantrums and do not give in, by giving her candy/sweets/etc. But, for Julia, Emily is a spoiled brat because Julia lets her get away with it.
It wouldn't be so bad, but we live with her. So she gets spoiled every day. And I will not let my daughter become a spoiled brat.
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